Amongst all the words in the planet
I think "practical" is the last word that describes me
Practicality is needed in this world in order to survive
It is effective
It is rational
It gives a sense of safety
But I don't want safety
I don't want "normal life" that everyone around me is chasing so relentlessly
I don't want the rest of my life stuck in an office cubicle after spending years of my life stuck inside the bricks of school, again forced to do things I don't have interest in
I don't want enormous paycheck by doing some meaningless job
I don't want marriage that ends up in separate beds some time down the road
I want a passionate life
I want a sense of wonder that overflows in everything I touch, everything I do
I want internal peace
and serene, healthy environment for me and people around me to grow
I want to read, and think, and finally do things that I want to do
I want to live by my own standards and stand up defending my values
Million times I have been told that I have impossible standards
That I'll never make it in the world with a mind like this
That it's simply not how society and the world function
That I need a certain set of 'practical' skills to survive
And what I think and discover will always matter less than what I'm able to do,
especially if it doesn't produce money
I am so tired of people telling me to be more grounded
Learning practical skills is important-yes, but so is thinking outside the box, being real, inspiring, and full of empathy in a world this numb
I am so tired of people telling me to pursue "realistic" goal
That there are so many ways someone like me can make a whole lot of money
But here's what I want:
I want to study human mind.
I want to be a voluntary doctor, healing those who are sick and lost in wars, or in places that don't have proper healthcare.
I won't have anything else outside those two
I won't bend my dreams, my passion, for wealth and stable life
Please do understand that things I want are different than yours
Because I would rather be alone with contentment than being with the wrong person
Because I would rather die with sparks in my heart than live with emptiness inside me
Because the life I want is spiritual, meaningful, deep, and free
That refusing to drive, refusing to date, refusing to bow down to the norms are a liberty of mine that should not be judged.
