May Tags!

#1 Between Shades of Gray

This is a book by Ruta Sepetys which I got by a little gambling. God, this is probably one of the best book I've read in the past 12 months. It's a YA novel (extremely mature for this genre) about an opinionated, artistic girl named Lina who lived in Lithuania in 1941. World War II crashed and the whole Baltic countries - Lithuania, Estonia, Latvia - were under Stalin's regime (Soviet). People who were considered anti-Soviet, including Lina's family, were taken by NKDV secret police and kept for years as workers doing hard labor, treated like animals, traveled miles from home in unimaginable condition, and left to starve and eventually die in harsh winter of Siberia.

Ruta Sepetys has a unique writing style which I enjoyed very much. There are just necessary amount of details, with each chapters about three-four pages long. Every sentence hits me in the right spot without trying to be sentimental. It's just the perfect dose of everything. I realize it's not easy to touch this sensitive subject without taking sides or being whiny, but Ruta managed to do it. This book opened my eyes to yet another part of war I was never exposed to before. True, this is not an easy book. I read it in 2 days, and this book left me with uneasy, sickening aftertaste. I couldn't sleep the night I finished this and just laid in my bed, thinking. Everytime I tried to close my eyes, the scenes from the book played in my brain and it's just real and horrifying. This book left a huge scar in my heart and made me reflect about what human race could do to its kind. Is our security really worth the blood of others? Do we, under unusual circumstances, have the ability to hurt people without hesitation, without a sense of guilt? This is one of the brutally powerful book. It really did mess me up, but nonetheless, genius.




#2 Midnight in Paris

What can I say? This movie has the charm that catches you from the start. It's about a man who writes and appreciates beauty, likes Paris in the rain, a little eccentric, and longs for a life in golden era (Paris in 1920s), but currently is stuck with Hollywood job and life in Malibu with a materialistic-pragmatist soon-to-be-wife. They went to Paris and the man, couldn't stand the blandness of his wife and her friends, escaped to solitude and found himself keep going to the past (1920s and 1890s). 

Midnight in Paris is thick with Woody Allen atmosphere, slightly more serious than his usual work, but the jokes get to you anyway. I love the yellowish palette they used which brought Paris to life. We see Paris shot from beautiful angles, dense with romanticism. We meet Hemingway and Fitzgeralds, Dali and Picasso. It's one hell of a fantasy. This, along with Pan's Labyrinth and The Little Prince, have become my top fantasy movies.

I myself kept saying that I was born in the wrong decade, but it's just a shattered illusion, a perpetual state of denial. I realized in the end, we ought to live in the now, no matter how screwed and shallow it seems to be. Every era has its own struggle which we sometimes overlook because of its glorification. All we can do is live - stop running, and find people who relate to us, whom we share our little worlds with. Dedicated to the romantic and the dreamer, the runaway and the searcher, this movie will make you see life from a different point of view.

The Monster's Back

I'm back again at the beginning
Suddenly it's square one, middle school all over again
I thought I was done with all of this
A clean slate, new mindset
And now it's happening again
The crying, the impulse, the escaping
The self doubt, the lost feeling, the misunderstanding
The guilt, the isolation, the pointing fingers
The excuses, the pretendings, the lies
The voices
I thought this has passed, that it doesn't matter anymore
I've grown out of this, see things with a new pair of eyes
Turns out all it takes is God taking back what's His for a moment
A polished event with balloons

Then it all crashes down

What's Happening

A perfect capture of these days' communication and friendship. Might not be this extreme but the essence is still the same; talking about self. Quite sad if you think about it,

March Tags!

Hi! For March (this is my favorite month of the year ehm), I’m doing movies. Enjoy!

#1 Room

So the oscar nomination has been out since February, and I’m doing a marathon on some of it. While Spotlight is awesome and totally worthy of best picture, I actually like Room more. I think it’s probably the best movie in 2015. It’s not often to find a movie like this. The acting is just believable, and there is an unquestionable chemistry between Brie and Jacob. The director is a genius, and along with the writer, must have worked so hard to make this movie possible. This is one of the most heartwarming movie I’ve watched.  Room doesn’t make you think hard, or edged in your seat, or amazed by overwhelming visual effects. It makes you understand and feel humanity. I truly believe something in my heart died (while some that had died lived again) when the movie was over and the credit started to play. All I want while watching this was hugging Jack and kept him from the world’s cruelty.

#2 An Education

This beginning of March I got through another mid-term test. While I always feel there’s something wrong with these tests and the school system, I just looked into the bigger picture of this nation’s education. This is not education. This is getting good grades for whatever it takes, get in good university at any cost, and be successful later in life. There is no thirst in knowledge, no learning just for the sake of it anymore. I don’t care if cheating is the only way I can get in, I’ll do it. I don’t care if I don’t understand any of this, as long I get in my dream school. I don’t care if it takes 20 million rupiahs to guarantee my seat in university, I’ll go for it. This is messed up. And most teachers just turn a blind eye seeing this, knowing that their schools will get praise for the amount of students get in popular universities all over the country while they get a raise. It’s a trap and I have to admit it’s harder than ever to maintain my ideality if I want to survive. And there are still pressure going on from parents and unrealistic standards from teachers, which makes it even harder.

Okay, that’s enough of that, I will go into the movie. This is the official synopsis of it:

In the early 1960's, sixteen year old Jenny Mellor lives with her parents in the London suburb of Twickenham. On her father's wishes, everything that Jenny does is in the sole pursuit of being accepted into Oxford, as he wants her to have a better life than he. Jenny is bright, pretty, hard working but also naturally gifted. The only problems her father may perceive in her life is her issue with learning Latin, and her dating a boy named Graham, who is nice but socially awkward. Jenny's life changes after she meets David Goldman, a man over twice her age. David goes out of his way to show Jenny and her family that his interest in her is not improper and that he wants solely to expose her to cultural activities which she enjoys. Jenny quickly gets accustomed to the life to which David and his constant companions, Danny and Helen, have shown her, and Jenny and David's relationship does move into becoming a romantic one. However, Jenny slowly learns more about David, and by association Danny and Helen, and specifically how they make their money. Jenny has to decide if what she learns about them and leading such a life is worth forgoing her plans of higher eduction at Oxford

An Education is a movie about a tragedy that could happen to any of us if the only thing we care for is success in life. This is what will happen if we don’t think education alone is important, if we think it’s just a tool to get what we want, to afford the kind of lifestyle we want in the future. This movie did make me question everything I already know about education. It’s an important movie that should’ve been watched by everyone, especially teenagers and truth-seekers. It’s beautifully done, and mind you this isn’t even Hollywood-release as far as I know.

Bonus quote:

-credit to: line account from A to A

Sooo I really recommend you to watch these. There are also some other movies and music that I really want to cover later, maybe I will update it maybe I won’t;D  I also apologize if anything I said earlier offend you, it’s just my view and of course it can be different from yours. Anyway, enjoy these masterpiece. You can let me know what you think of themJ

Old in The Making

This morning when I woke up, I'm no longer a child. I'm a solid adult, legal by law.

I always thought the whole birthday thing is nonsense, because it's really just the day you are born, randomly, coincidentally, one out of 365.

But I don't know, a miracle struck this morning. After I'm doing my morning prayer, I suddenly got this realization that I'm, in fact, is not the center of the universe.

Of course you aren't.

I know, but see, all my life I've been struggling with it. I take things personally, making connection in my head why some people act a certain way around me, what they think of me, do they assume I'm (insert adjectives). I'm embarrassed to say this, but actually I always thought everything has to do with me.

This realization just came from deep down this morning, and I'm grateful for it. I feel really at ease with myself right now, like I don't have to worry all the time. This might've been the best and only gift I receive today. I hope I'll mature soon, and this is my starting point in life.

Thought I was an old soul, turns out I'm just a child.

A Little Slap From God to Keep Our Feet at The Ground

Mereka bilang sudah saatnya kita turun. Sudah saatnya roda berputar. Usahanya sudah tidak seperti yang dulu-dulu lagi.

Mereka bilang ini saatnya memberi kesempatan pada yang lain, saatnya mereka menjadi pahlawan.

Yang mereka tidak tahu adalah usaha kami, beban di punggung kami, dan janji-janji yang menunggu untuk ditepati. Mereka tidak tahu bahwa untuk menjadi pahlawan, ada pihak yang dijatuhkan. Pihak yang dalam hal ini bukan antagonis (tapi tak ada yang tahu karena well, proses persiapannya tidak disorot kamera).

We deserved this.

They didn’t see it. They only see what they wanted to see – a bunch of people that didn’t even try, but randomly got the ability to be a winner.

We’re not. There’s so little talent involved here. It’s pure hard work, our work.

Mungkin doa kita masih kurang, mungkin kita masuk pada tahun yang salah. But nobody can say we didn’t work hard. Nobody can say the competition was at its fairest, and that we lost by objectivity. Nobody can say we didn’t take this seriously, and that we didn't try as hard as we used to be. That crying when we walked out of the door, it was not of regret, but rather, of disappointment.

Tapi nggak apa-apa. We’re the ones who dare to dream. We have visions, and we chase it. We didn’t back down even though we know it’s gonna be hard.

Di sisi manisnya, kita saling mengenal.

Menghabiskan malam-malam bersama, satu potong ayam dan susu milo.

Mengucap doa setelahnya, diterangi cahaya senter yang melukis bayangan lingkaran tangan raksasa yang naik-turun seiring irama di atap yang setengahnya berlubang.

Bermimpi di bawah langit malam, membentuk bayangan dari tangan-tangan yang lelah di langit-langit istana, tertawa 

Berjalan di bawah hujan untuk sembahyang selepas matahari terbenam dan bersujud kepada-Nya, berdoa agar semua tak sia-sia.

Tak ada yang sia-sia.

From it we learn. My God, do we learn.

Lifetime Show

Because if we take time to look into someone else's life, we won't find any black and white. We realize that everybody is a protagonist in their own story, and they have their reason to act the way that others may perceive as evil.